City City Bang Bang!*

Finally, it's out! Pardon the delay, I was just not in the right mood to write. This one is gonna be long, so, pardon that too!Anyway, let's start off with the basics trip details:

Locations: Ernakulam -> Munnar -> Thekkady -> Kumarakom
Total distance to be covered: Close to 600 kms
Time available: 5 days to be exact.
Mode of transport: Chennai -> Ernakulam => Train, To everywhere else => Qualis
Company: 2 couples and 1 stag. Total fun material.

After a 12-hour train journey to Ernakulam (11 hours of which we slept) our white Qualis met us, along with Raju- our guide cum driver. I, keeping up with tradition, was the back-seater. Which in this case was so not cool. Which meant having American Tourister trolleys for company and being the official supply cabin of the vehicle. Which also meant that it really didn't matter if I had motion sickness, I just had to hand over whatever was required whenever required. More fun material!

Destination I: Munnar
Temperature: For a Chennaiite, just the right temperature to be turned into a human popsicle.
Ok, embarassment time. I have to confess my ignorance. I don't know why or how, I always thought Munnar was one of those beachy places with an abundance of sunshine. Somehow 'Munnar' just doesn't have a hill-station-ish ring to it, like say, Kodaikanal or Ooty. Thankfully, when I was just about packing my bags, Pp 'reminded' me to carry warm clothing. And the closest to 'warm clothing' I carried along was a couple of shrugs (For those uninitiated into women's-clothing, these are those small jacket-ish things that are meant not to cover anything but just be worn anyway. And oh, both of mine had holes all over).

The trip, though, helped me to discover another of my hidden facets - getting up a mountain makes me as sick as, uhm, someone sick (I should stop trying to use similies). I've heard a lotta people tell me earlier that they tend to feel nauseous when going up and blah, but I always thought I was that 'steel-body' kinds and nothing could affect me. And so through the entire trip, the only position I could be found in, in the car, would be curled- hugging the seat with my eyes tightly shut and that weirdly pukey, groggy expression on my face. But I guess the rest of the world in that car were oblivious to my discomfort. Every now and then I would hear someone go, "Preeti? What are you doing? Why so silent? And oh yea, pass me the water". And I would mumble something incoherently and they would go, "Always sleeping. Wonder why you came for the trip!" They should be thanking their stars I wasn't well enough right then.

To top it all, our 'resort' was located somewhere close to the tip of the mountain and the only other thing we could hear at night other than our own echoes, was the slow but constant zzzhhhhhhhh of the wind through the trees. And it was LOUD! Like each tree had it's own amplifier and 3-D surround speakers or whatever. I slept in between my parents (Fine, I'm a killjoy, but in my defense, those noises were pretty eerie!) Dad fell sick and Dolz was puking through the night. So much for a 'relaxing' vacation.

We did do our share of 'sight-seeing' and 'photo-taking'. We even climbed some real high peak to spot a couple of 'wild-goats'! C'mon, they are goats!!! Incidentally, when I was passing on this 'just goats up there' information to the rest of the family, one of the officials out there happened to eavesdrop on our conversation and he immediately burst out, "It is naat justa goatsa madam! These goatsa are seen wonly here! Nowhere else in the entaayree warld you will see this, ok???So don't say 'just goats' ok??? Too bad for him I was just recuperating from the journey uphill. (My motion sickness seems to have been a blessing in disguise for a lotta people, huh?)

The rest was the usual valley, waterfall, echo point thing. I mean, what else could a mountain offer!? Yea, yea it was beautiful, picteresque and all that. Yea, every crappy picture of mine looked frame-worthy because the place was just so-damn-beautiful, but even excessive beauty could cause sore eyes! We were really glad when 2 nights after, it was time to head to Destination 2. I must say, you see one mountain, you've seen 'em all!

Destination 2: Thekkady
Temperature: Uhm, sunny but cold. Not too bad
We found Thekkady a lot better than Munnar. We reached around 12.30 pm, had lunch and wanted to check-in. But we were told by our driver that once we check in, we couldn't get out after 6 pm. We were intrigued and assumed it was because wild animals would be on their rampage or something equally exciting, but he confirmed it was nothing of the sort and had to do with political crap.

We were in a 'Tiger Reserve' with supposedly 45 tigers inside and we spotted anything but. Infact, I think all we saw (apart from killer insects) were 'Wild' Domestic animals. Like wild pig, wild buffalo, wild goats etc etc.

Me and Dolz were certain we spotted quite a large no. of UFIs here -Unidentified Flying Insects. And by large no., I mean LARGE. If in Munnar it was the noise that kept me awake, here it was the lack of it and the fear of waking up to an insect-infested body! (inspite of sleeping in between my parents!) Thankfully, we spent just one night and a couple of hours before that here.

Other stuff we did there was: Go on an early morning boat-ride (we saw a lone elephant somewhere in the distance, or so I think), watch a Kalaripayattu show (which was AWESOME really. Will try and post the videos), go to a wax museum (which had wax dolls of Mohanlal and Mammooty, which we got to know from the sign-post below. They also had aquariums and really ugly paintings on display), do a bit of shopping (for nothing really) AND do an elephant ride. This was good. Me, Dolz and Harsh atop Sankarankutty (who was anything but kutti, ie, small). A 30-minute ass-fracturing ride. But who am I to complain when I'm not the one with 200 kilos on top huh? Oh, there was also this absolutely adorableeeee 1-year old ele baby named Kannan. He was just soooooooo cute and naughty! He even caught my mum's saree with his trunk and almost did a mini Draupadi-sequence there, if not for his care-taker's rebuke. It left my mum giggling and blushing while my Dad was FURIOUS! Time now for Destination 3.

Destination 3: Kumarakom
Temperature: Hot, humid, sweaty
This is the Kerala I thought I knew. And also what I wanted to see. Coconut trees et al! We stayed on one of 'em house-boats (corrected thanks to xh). Pretty good actually. Even the food. We were really in for a surprise when the boys on the deck turned out to be really good cooks! And they made alllllll of our favorite mallu food - puttu and kadalai, pazham pori, Pomfret fry for Daddy - all of it.

I know I sound like I really liked it. I did, but not for more than a day. (Part of my liking was because I was thankful as ever to be on levelled roads and no hair-pin bends!) The initial ride across the back-waters was really nice. It even rained. But how long can you stare at a huge expanse of water!?? After a point, I was just yearningly looking at the land across. It was the thought that there was just another day to go that kept me going. But I must say, the best food and sleep that we had through the entire trip was here. (Ignoring the million mosquitoes and lizards)

Finally, it was time to get back. We pit-stopped at 2 beautiful temples - Chottanikara and Vaikom Sivan temple on the way to Ernakulam. There we met up with a couple of our realllyyyy close family friends from Bahrain and it was time for a lotta nostaligia. That done, we were all set for Chennai.

I realized that I'm a total city person. None of this wildlife, greenery stuff for me. It's all fine to a limit, but not more. I just love the noise and bustle of a city, the fast-life, the luxury- everything! I need to see people move around, not just still-life. I can get my dose of the nature stuff from Discovery& NatGeo, paintings and google and I'm totally fine with that! I'll put up photos shortly. Left them at home and didn't wanna put off posting this because of that. And oh, thank you for your patient reading. You asked for it!

Update! P.S: 1. *- The title IS a popular show on Radio City (as Scribblers Inc. pointed out) It isn't a coincidence, I used the name to express my love for the 'city' but I guess I should've included this attribution before :P
2. I've also come to the conclusion that most of you thought I had a good time. Well, I had an O.K time which definitely is not the same as good. This post was meant to be sarcastic but I guess a lot of it wasn't received. Anyway, maybe I should accept that (it sounds like) I had a good time!

I'm BACK!!!

Buhahahahahaha!

I've just GOT to tell you all about my tour. I'm like brimming with enthusiasm (!) to let it all out. But I just haven't gotten around to writing it out today. So I'm gonna let that be done tomorrow. BUT I just couldn't resist coming here and telling y'all that I'm BACK! And boy! Am I happy to be back or WHAT?!*
*Did that give away how my trip went???

P.S: I 'almost' kissed the Chennai Central floor today morning. But, uhm, decided against it as the 'suveet shmell' hit my nose :D
2. I will clear all the back-logs in replies to the comments in the previous post tomorrow as well! I'm HAPPY!!!

2 is Company, 3 a Crowd, 4 is FUN and so this TAG!

Anoo tagged me thrice (!) and Wolfie once. I'm gonna do 'em All-in-One, my way. I'm combining 6 quirks-about-me and 5 things-people-dont-know-about-me and making it 6 Whatevers About Me:

1. I've got 15 first cousins. Thanks to Grandad's favourite past-time => Mum has 10 siblings (and she's the first)

2. I'm shit scared of the dark. Which explains why I can never ever sleep alone. I would never dare to. Infact even when friends stay over, and if we ever do get around to sleeping (a rarity), I would do so only if they agree to have the lights on, or I would let them sleep and slowly walk out into my parents' room and cuddle up to Daddy.

3. On any day, at any time, if you ask me,"What's up?" I'd only say,"Nothing. It is soooooo boring!". I'm a born cribber.

4. My eyes are extremely 'power-full'. -4 and -4 to be exact. Yea, I wear lens (and glasses at home)

5. I love, collect and cherish (after stickers) pencil boxes. I've got close to 30 pencil boxes from my adult life (=> engg and MBA). And scales and pencils and sharpeners and erasers and colour pencils and water colours and brushes.

6. I dislike long hair. On me or anybody. Most of my friends would be profusely shaking their heads for this (you can stop now before it falls off). I'm alwayz the one to remind them it's time for a haircut! I would never dream or dare to have hair more than 2" below my shoulders. You should see Dolly, she's like got it down to her waist. *crinkles nose* If only she would listen!

10 Things I miss in my life right now: (In random order)
1. Pp, who is in Singapore right now. Come back soon :(
2. Being occupied
3. Being carefree
4. Being thoughtless
5. Everything about
6. College life - engineering to be specific
7. ICECREAM! And soon, mangoes :(
8. Being able to fit into many of my old clothes. Especially those jeans :(
9. Life alone (-) parents. Those into-the-wee-hours-of-the-morning talks with friends and those million stay overs and LOUD music. I love it with Dad and Mum around too, but those days were really something.
10. The good 'ol days with Aj and Andu (and the gang). Those 4 days - were entirely something else, huh? Lazying around with Lays and Pepsi, Dumbcharades, google and you-tube, Russel Peters and Grey's Anatomy, Simba hair and all those tears. Wish I could relive that for just one day. Time for next!

10 Things I Wanna Achieve (not necessarily) Within a Decade:
1. 10 kilos off in 10 years...? Or maybe more. The more the better :D
2. Get married and have 2 kids.
3. Take Mum and Dad on a World Tour. This is something I really, really wanna do.
I'm definitely short-sighted as I haven't been able to look too deep into the future! I've been sitting with my fingers frozen for the past 7 minutes, to be exact. FINE! I'll just continue!
4. Go on a roller-coaster ride. Did I mention I'm ride-averse?
5. Get 3 more tattoos. I'm not letting out what and where for fear of idea-theft.
6. I just recently pierced my ears again, so now there are 4 on the left and 3 on the right (maybe I'd put up a snap sometime) so I think that option is out. Maybe my nose again (I had pierced it once and it fortunately or unfortunately closed). But I know quite a few people who are against this :D
7. Get my hair cut real short. Boy cut kinds. It's been a dream for toooooo long. (Yes, I dream weird)
8. Just reached #8?? Oh man, this one is difficult. Hmm, oh yea, start my own restaurant.
9. Start my own boutique.
10. Go to the Himalayas. Not to surrender, but just to see the heavenly abode. I'm as pious as it gets!

Last, but not the least, The Book Tag by Adi aka Wolfdude. It comes with its own set of rules:
Pick up the nearest book.
Open to page 123.
Find the fifth sentence.
Post the next three sentences.
Tag five people, and acknowledge the person who tagged you.

I swore I'd do this asap only because the book next to me would provide a lot of interesting information which I just really wanted to share.

Book: KHANDWA MUNICIPAL CORPORATION, BID DOCUMENT, VOLUME II, PRICE OFFER-I
Page No. 123, Line 5-8 read:
'D' is duties/ excise payable per unit of electrical energy (KWH) on the date of submission of tender, if applicable. 'A' is Any other levy/ charge per unit if applicable on the date of submission of the tender. 'E' is the Amount of difference payable/ recoverable by KMC for prevailing bills of energy charges.

If you understood that, hats off to you. If you didn't, Welcome to my World. Any wonder why I hate my job? :D

Yaaay! I'm done! I'm going to go on and pat myself on my back while you guys take your time to recover from my brilliance. I tag Mayth, Wolfie, Janie, Satti, Prathiboo, Aneri, Arun (ONLY cuz I know you won't do this), Anoo, Maverick, K10, Busygurl etc etc on Tags you haven't already done from here. Take your pick. The rest of you can do it too.

Randomness at its Best

I have a lot of random stuff I wanna write about. Stuff that definitely doesn't warrant a separate post for itself, some of them updates from previous posts:

1. My baby cousin's operation: He got admitted yesterday. They haven't fixed his operation date yet. Apparently there are close to 10-20 operations happening there on a daily basis and they aren't able to find a 'slot' for him. The only thing, more than the operation itself, that everyone is worried sick about is how to keep that lil hyper-active nutcase bound to his bed for godknowshowmany days! Damn, the irony of it all.

2. Daddy's wallet: He got it back guys! I kinda forgot to put up this update actually. But yea, he got it back. He had dropped it at some shop and some guy (God Bless his soul) found it and returned it back to him, with everything intact. Nice people really do exist :)

3. I have a lousy ass cold. The one that makes you feel like your throat is on fire and your nostrils are stuffed with cotton. The one that makes you feel like your head is filled only and ONLY with solid lead and ears are high-pressure cabins with scary 'pops' going off now and then. Lousy!

4. Some crazyyyyyy stuff has been happening in a friend's life (those who know, know). I really don't know how else to describe it but for crazy, silly, nonsensical, irritating, frustrating etc etc. I don't wanna get into details here, but seriously, I think I would be on a ship on the way to NeverLand by now had I been in her situation. So much for it being 21st century with 'modern' values and all that. Just praying time would sort it all out for her and him.

5. Why I write. Ok, let's down to some facts. I don't generally new-blog-hop. Not even when I'm dead bored (which is like 99.95% of the time). I don't think I have that much of patience. It works this way for me. When someone new comments on my posts, I see theirs and leave a comment and the bond is formed. As a daily ritual, though, I check the pages of those on my side-bar and I'm close-to-content with that. (I know the list keeps increasing). So, why do I write? At the expense of sounding Highly (with a capital H) cliched, I write to vent. I really don't write for others to read. Agreed, I do use 'guys' and 'people' and stuff like that, but it isn't directed at anyone really - it's just a figure of speech. I like writing, no, I LOVE writing and that's why I do it. And this goes out to noone in particular.

6. I'm ADDICTED. To Icecreams. And I would never ever agree that my cold has anything to do with it. I've never quite been this addicted before. Excepting the last, what, 4 days...? I think I've had icecream pretty much everyday. My favourite flavour of the season is this totally deliciousss strawberry yoghurt from Emilios. Oh yummmmm! I can't go on with this, I'm way too tempted and knowing that I can't have 'em right now is downright torture.

I'm pretty cryey- whiney right now. So, That's All Folks!*
*I'm just quoting Warner Bros.

P.S: 1. Uhhhm, the 'Best' in the title isn't an adjective to describe this post, I just liked the way it sounded in totality. And uhhmm, this is directed at noone in particluar too :P

Block and Tackle

Oh please, don't get silly, we are NOT gonna play games on my blog. You get that? Huh? Ok??

Uhmm, I'm sorry I snapped out like that. I have a reason - a proper, justified, totally-makes-sense explanation. The juices aren't flowing, the connection isn't there- it's short-circuited perhaps? Some evil person has put an evil hex on me, thanks to which, a strange something is wedged in between my thoughts and my fingers, thus breaking that connection, thereby resulting in lack of flow of thoughts. See how complicated I made that sound? See how I just used exactly 40 words to desribe what can simply be said in 4 words- I have writer's block. See how my mind is thinking 4 words but conveying them 10 times? You see???

I've been reading this over and over at many others' blogs- xh, Drenched, Busygurl - but I was always like,"Ha! Fat chance of that happening to me!" I guess I 'thought' a bit too early. And now the spell has started taking effect. Everytime I think of writing, nothing pops up! And I thought it was easy :(

It just doesn't feel right not to write. Thankfully, inspiration came in the form of a comment! In my previous post, C R D had mentioned How Relatives say the Darndest (read: nerve-wrackingly-annoyingest) Things. I found that sooo totally true and so I decided to write about a few such irrelevant dialogues spoken when there was absolutely no need for it to be spoken. (that's what irrelevant means right? Now you see what I mean???)

Situation 1: When Mom was in the ICCU after her Angioplasty, this one class mate of mine, who sadly lost his Mom to heart-attack a few years earlier, held on to my Mom's feet crying and said,"Aunty, meri mummy bhi heart-attack se hi mari thi". The word to note is "bhi". Thankfully, she was partially conscious and her knowledge of hindi isn't extensive. But she still managed to remember it a while later and ask me about it!

Situation 2: A Friend's wedding last week. Now, this is hearsay, for I wasn't there when this happened. Apparently a 'cousin' of the bride came upto her when she was getting ready for her big moment and told her,"Ippo dan paaka ponnu madri iruke (Only now you look like a girl). Much better than your dumb jeans and t-shirts in which your ass protrudes out". Awww, now isn't that just the sweetest thing to say???

Situation 3: A family friend's recent visit home. (Unfortunately) I was caught alone with the uncle, just when I wanted to catch some sleep. Nice uncle really, he was earnestly giving me advice on "How to Choose the Right Guy in 5 minutes - Arranged Marriage Style". Mom had gone out and happened to call right then and I gave the phone to Uncle to talk to her. And as they spoke, I guess she mentioned that Dad recently had a giddy spell for Godknowswhatever reason. An absolutely flabbergasted uncle said,"Oh! That isn't good, I say! Please ask him to get it checked, I say! Because, sudden fainting means either:
1. He has a heart problem
2. The brain stem has some problem and could result in haemmorhage
3. His spinal cord has some issue OR
4. Could be nothing.
So please be careful".(Did I mention he's not a Doctor...??) I'm surprised Mom didn't faint on the other end of the phone. (He started off the conversation by asking her why she sounded breathless and how sweating isn't good for a heart patient. He also successfully managed to undo 2 years of our convincing talks with Mum in just under 2 minutes, by telling her,"Heart attacks can come again. Blocks can come again. We are never safe". No comments.)

Situation 4: My Cousin's Class 12 results. A few years back I figured out she's dyslexic and even though the entire family would never get close to understanding the symptoms or her, I stopped asking/ advicing/ pressurising her to 'study'. And so when she got 63% in her 12th boards, I was bordering on elation because, knowing her, it really was no mean task. Heart of hearts I know she was happy with her results (basically passing) too but she couldn't obviously let it be known that she was content with just that much and so she had, no choice but, to cry. Right then, one of her paternal uncles called and said,"63%??? You won't get admission anywhere. And oh, your other cousin xyz got 94%. Bye." and he hung up. Encouragement was his middle name, by the way.

I'm not even claiming to be the Perfect Speaker in all situations or anything. Actually, not even close. The foot-in-mouth syndrome is common but I guess there are certain situations when extra-caution must be taken. If all of us just think before we speak (and that includes me), the World would be a better place to live in.

(You see how how I extrapolated a seemingly simple topic to World Peace..? Damn, I'm losing it. I rest my block)

P.S: 1. For those of you who didn't get my initial outburst, the title is a popular game/ event played at most school and college culturals.
2. Long time since I professed my undying love (on my blog) to BujiBoo, Pp and my Best Friends* - Robo, Janie, Satti, Prathiboo, Andu San, Ani, Rekoo etc. MUAH! *I've included only the Best Friends who read my blogs, the others are loved no less :) Ok, I'm nuts. I'm gonna shut up! :)

Work Culture??? Pah!

This is probably the only moment in (my) blogging history that I feel i should've maintained anonymity.

Why? Because I HATE my office and I'm gonna be all super-bitchy in this post and what if someone from here is reading it...? Hmm, actually thinking of it, I'm sure none of these stupid, sad-ass morons around me would even come close to understanding the meaning of blogging.

Why am I here then? I guess it was because my aunt recommended it and so once I got the job, I couldn't turn it down. Also, the pay is decent and then there's the proximity factor. Hardly 10 min from my house. I should've just listened to my Dad. He kept telling me NOT to take this up. But I was insistent, as always, for no apparent reason. First of all, work and me itself are like miles apart. On top of that, I need to work in a place like this. So much for career idu adu. I quit my previous one 5 months into it cuz of this. And it's just been 4 months here. So, Why this frustration?

Reasons:
1. I work in a 3-member department. 2 men & me. Both married, both cheap fuckers. And they have ego-clashes as to who the bigger fucker is.

2. No Freedom of Speech & Movement: There's just ONE girl in this entire damn office that I talk to. Which in itself is a first for me. As in, I generally tend to make friends really fast. But here, since I'm in a totally different department, interaction with others is low. And I'm not complaining because I think I already have too many friends to handle. Now, I sit in the basement and she in the 1st floor. There isn't a loo on my floor (Yea! Imagineee!!!) and so I need to go up everytime. When I do, I just stop over at her place and do the usual "Had lunch?How's work?I'm so boredddd!" talk that lasts all of 2 mins and get back to my seat. Apparently sometime recently, her boss asked her why I keep coming up and talking to her so many times!!! (For 3 l of water, 3 loo-visits is within permissable limits, right??)

3. They have like a fuck-all 'dress code'. You have to wear a dupatta. Even if it has a high neck and full sleeves. Apparently, there are people from local colleges who work here as well and so the precaution.

Corporate Culture - my fucking torn bamboo chappal! I know it probably isn't reason enough to quit, but I sincerely wish I could. I could just say it a million times over that I'm not meant to work. I should be having my own restaurant or boutique. I should be designing clothes and conjuring up delicacies rather than preparing tender bid documents! Ayo ayo, enna kodumai sir idhu! (Translation: Oh!Oh! What torture sir this is! As alwayz, effect lost in translation)

These are also moments when I wouldn't mind being married - as long as the Mister is loaded and I would be designated "Home Maker"! *sigh*

Sorry seems to be the hardest word!

Everyone makes mistakes. Come on, to Err is Human after all, right? But what if you make the same (or any) mistake over and over again? Are you to be forgiven? Or, more precisely, am I to be forgiven?

I seem to have a mental and verbal block when it comes to mouthing the word 'Sorry'. I actually gave a 15 min lecture to Prathi recently on why I feel saying sorry is total bullshit. My arguement...? That there's no point in saying sorry once the damage is done. I think it adds insult to injury. Like- "I'm sorry I said you were a fat pig". "Oh, I'm soooo sorry I made fun of your teeth, hair, eyes and nose the other day". "Oops, sorry for stepping on your freshly pedicured feet with my freshly soiled (& hard soled) shoes". I mean, what's the point? Does saying sorry really assuage that moment of pain/grief of whatever?

It's not like I don't say sorry at all. It just takes me a while to say it like I mean it. I need to feel the need to say it. To feel that I've done something wrong. I equate saying sorry to melodrama. Because the word alone is never enough and it has to be supported by explanations. And I suck at it. My (copyrighted) explanation for anything would be,"This is me. This is how I am. Period". Which obviously is never a strong enough reason for what I did, and definitely never understood by the other party. Most times, I just say it because I have to. Like a template. To appease the situation before it blows out of proportion. Like that pinch of sugar/salt you add to take the fizz outta aerated drinks.

I also get irritated when someone says sorry. 1 sorry is definitely not equal to 1 liter of saline water. And 1 sorry is definitely not equal to @%^&* joules of energy spent bawling like a mad woman! But if it is hurled at me, it wouldn't elicit more than an "Uh, ok. Because I don't know whether to say it's ok, or it's not ok or...what? I don't know!

And so, if and when I do say a sorry and it is accompanied by a decent-sounding explanation, you can be sure it means I'm really, totally, absolutely sorry. Like from the bottom-most bottom of my big heart. From every artery, vein, auricle and ventricle of my heart. You get it right?

Now, I'm gonna do something pretty dumb. I'm gonna use this post to apologize to someone I've NEVER said sorry to till now. For all the pain and hurt I have caused. Sooooooo many things I wish I could go back in time and Ctrl+Z!

That person is 'me'. This apology is for:
1. Hurting myself over and over again.
2. Unecessary, unwanted quanitities of tears shed.
3. Making stupid decisions (in the past and now) inspite of knowing that it wouldn't work out.
4. And most recently, for using the eye make-up remover unjudiciously, knowing that I'm allergic to it, resulting in, like obvious, a scab-like under-eye allergy.

I sincerely hope that I shall be forgiven by my Divine Self.

P.S: 1. Don't reach out for the phone to call the asylum. Don't worry, I certainly do not suffer from "Multiple-personality disorder". This is just me. This is just how I am ;)

2. If it seems like I've contradicted myself somewhere there, it maybe so, because my thoughts on this aren't all that clear, even to me.

3. I started this post day before yesterday during one of my usual low moments. I did something stupid again and I really felt like saying sorry (to myself) for letting myself go through those shitty emotions and all that crazy pain. But then, the whole of yesterday, I was doing a lot better and I didn't feel like going ahead with it. But then again today I got reminded of what I did and so here it is, a full-blown apology note to myself! [Confused...??? :D]

4. Uh, I was supposed to add another P.S, don't remember it now :D

Excuse ME? Just who are YOU to tell ME that?!?

So much of bickering, so much of judging, so much of bitching in the air. And it's all so over- whelming to think and react to it. Yes, I'm talking about nasty statements, hurtful words and watchamacallit- Criticism, with a capital C.

For once, this post isn't instigated by some recent personal experience (Thankfully, nothing mean has been said against me recently..hehe..Uhmmm, ofcourse I'm discounting the 'unmentionable terminology' my mum directs at me everyday!). I'm gonna try and make this an objective post. On criticism, judgemental-ism and the likes. That faint line between well and ill intentioned comments that's there and yet, not quite. And I'd like to know how y'all react to it.

A recent post by Keshi on her favourite Indians caused a huge commotion in her comments section. People were telling her who she should've included and who she shouldn't have. I mean, seriously, do they even know what they're saying? As she rightly said, it was a list of HER favourite Indians and she likes them cuz she likes them. She doesn't need to explain it out to the world? If they've got an opinion, state it. Not everyone likes the same things and that's understandable. But to go on and belittle her choice and her and blah blah, that's a little too much, don't you think?

I'm an extremeeeellllyyyy sensitive person, unfortunately, and am pathetic with criticism (All those Zodiac sign thingies say that it's a Cancerian trait. And so, I'm gonna blame it on that) Be it positive or negative, I'd take it to be negative. If my mum tells me I need to lose weight, I think,"She hates me. She loves Dolls more cuz she's thinner". (Not kidding, that's what I think) If Dad says I could've probably gotten better marks if I worked a little harder, I'd think,"Well, he hates me too. I should probably just run away!" And I'd extrapolate those thoughts to the rest of the World hating me and feel like a nobody at the end of it! [Ultimate result: Depressed blogs ;)]

My mind pretty much shuts-down when I'm the victim of any form of scrutiny. Rationality takes a back seat and my defensive mode kicks in. No matter what the other person is saying. Even if implementing what they say is gonna transform into an angel overnight. But then, that's me.

There are those who've got a fuck-all attitude and I seriously admire that. I'm in awe of those who can brush aside such issues and go on like noone's said a thing. This is probably one thing we gotta learn from celebrities. Being in the hot-seat all the time, every move of theirs being scrutinized and publicized, they really need to have a lot of endurance to get through with it all.

I don't know if i've digressed somewhere. I've read and re-read what I've written to try and add a lil more sense to it but...not happening. So I'm gonna stop now. But not before asking all of you to tell me how you'd react to criticism- constructive or destructive.

P.S: 1. The title is indirectly linked to the post. A common retort to such comments. Just incase anyone wanted to know :)
2. @OK: If your reading this, my sensitivities should probably explain why I gave you that unwanted, extra long comment in reaction to your meaningfully harmless comment. Just struck a wrong chord somewhere deep within. My apologies!

I NEED to know now...Does it really hurt...?

Not love. Not breaking up. Not tattoos or peircings. What I wanna know is - Does it really hurt...to SMILE...?

My parents have taught me to be pleasant and polite. And being all full of manners as I am (atleast I try!), I smile at people I know. Not necessarily a buddy or the one-who-sits-beside me. I mean, could be someone on the same floor. There is this one girl at work, whom I see pretty often. I smile at her when I see her and what does she do...? Pass me by like I don't even exist! (This has happened,like, thrice)I mean, it's technically impossible to miss me, you know, thanks to my 'towering personality' (= huge). Besides, I was looking straight at her and smiling. And so, she cannot even use the pathetic excuse that I was probably smiling at the person behind her (or maybe she thought it was the cupboard...?or the wall perhaps...?) Doesn't anyone reciprocate niceties anymore?

She's not the only one. Me and Ruby joint aerobics recently. We were late (as usual) for our first class and the instructor told us to join the crowd and follow suit. We were all left feet and tripping and I looked at the girl in front and smiled sheepishly. She, inturn, threw me this disinterested, 'I'm-too-busy-to-waste-time-smiling' expression! (Adding insult to injury is the fact that she's as thin as a stick of asparagus while I'm that huffing, puffing plump tomato) Thankfully, there was another nice lady who just asked us to hang in there till the end.

With medical reports (eg: Smiling involves just 17 facial muscles and...), poems (eg: Smiling is a merry thing, blah blah blah"), songs (Remember Boyzone's biggest hit: Words, which began with-Smile, an everlasting smile.......??") and the likes of Hallmark/Archies coming up with the 'Smiley' (that cute, yellow thing on cards/keychains/anything & everything) , the entire 'Smile' concept is pretty much in your face. And so, I'm gonna assume the non-smiling kinds are extremely ignorant people with no life. Living in an igloo without a window and no humans around => Zilch people skills.

Or maybe I'm just ancient. Maybe being grumpy is in and I never realized. Well, the lean, mean men have always been considered hot. You know, the 'bad boy' image and all. Maybe that works for women as well.....? Maybe it's better. Would save guys the effort of saying those corny lines like "Your smile just killed me" or "I love the way your eyes light up when you smile" etc. Or maybe, they'd just change them and go, "Your frown just scared the shit outta me" or "Your dead pan eyes and frigid expression just turn me on".

Whatever maybe, a smile works for me. Lifts me up to smile and be smiled at. What do you think?

Million $ quote: "To Smile or not to Smile. That is the question" (by Will.I.A'int Shakespreeti)

P.S: Update: Ever since I've written this post (like 30 min ago), I've seen Girl#1 twice and I couldn't help but smile so hard, I looked sillier than the Cheshire Cat in 'Alice in Wonderland'!

My Humour has gone to the....Blogs!

Scene 1: Sitting alone at work
Me (thinking): "Hahahahahaha! Oh MY GOD! This's..hahaha...awesomely...hehehe...funny" *Tear wiping* *Reaching out to mobile. Ping*10 (X,Y,Z's no.)*
"Where are you? Are you online? Yea..? Ok, PLEASE check out this guy's blogs. They are just HILARIOUS! (continue giving her tidbits of info from them as well as the titles she just has to read)

Scene 2: Local chat shop in Purasawalkam
Dolz: "Oh man, marus (aka marwaris) are @$%$*@&&" (that, inspite of being married to one)
Ruby: "Hahahahahahaha"
Me: "Haha. Btw, that reminds me, today I read this blog and this guy said this and then he went on to say that and blah blah blah......Man, chance e illa! Hahahahaha!"
Dolz & Ruby: *Groan* (and they continue digging into their muruku sandwich)

Scene 3: Ruby's ZenDen #3033
Ruby & me (singing...uhh actually...SCREAMING) : "When you want it the most, there's no easy way out...Na na na na...That's the way it is!" [By Celine Dion. We couldn't resist singing along and recreating her contorted facial expressions, hand crunches et all, as it played on Radio City. Long time memories, you see :)]
Me (Struck by sudden thunder-bolt) : "Heyyyy, you know what....."
Ruby (Cutting me mid-way): "What? Your gonna quote another of your new found blog-love's extra-witty, extra-funny jokes...?"
Me (not taking in the sarcasm): "Yea!This one's realllll good.................."
Ruby (grimacing, groaning, cursing AND turning up the volume): " Go on...!"

Scene 4: My green sofa
Me: "Hahahaha"
Me: "Hehehehe"
Me: "Hihihoho" [only thing missing was the head-scratching :D]
My Mom (looking at me worriedly & calling Dad): "Inga vaango. Preeti enamo thaniya sirikra. Enaku bayama iruku!" [Please come here. Preeti's laughing alone. I'm scared!"]

Ok. This is really serious now. This is real bothersome material. Ever since I discovered I could blog from office, I've been sooooo happy that all I do is browse/read/re-read/think of writing blogs. It's my sole activity (other than the trail mails within our 'gang') and I hit IE and type out blogspot faster than I sit down at my desk! It probably is ok that I am blog-obsessed, but my humour (or atleast what I consider humour) is seriously taking a turn for the worse. Can't help it. I've just gotttt to insert interjections from the most recent post I've read. I've just got to take references from them and enlighten the non-blog readers in my group. (who don't read them cuz they really don't care to or would much rather do other things and hence do not really want the enlightenment!) I didn't quite realize (yea, the realization continues) the extent of this obsession until I started working on my next post and I couldn't go beyond what I read. I was (and am) so stifled by the super-talented other writers that my creative juices are just not, forget flowing, being generated! And the result is this :)

Hopefully I'm gonna get outta this soon. Till then, I'm giving you all the link to the funniest blogger I've come across: http://www.krishashok.wordpress.com/ (Responsible for my recent bout of crazy laughiness) A must-MUST read!

Bald n 50, hot n sexy..?!

Rating: A

Disclaimer: This is not a work of fiction. Rather, as always, a work of emotion. It is not meant to hurt or please either sex. Dissent is natural and welcome.

Latest addition to my ‘List of Taboo Words’ - MEN (Also includes Man, Boy and anything masculine. FYI, few others would be diet, weight-loss etc etc).

Irrespective of age, I think they all think with the wrong part of their anatomy. I agree there are exceptions. There are those scattered, unintentionally good souls. The ‘decent’ lot. But then as my profs in MBA would say, “Exceptions are not examples!” And so, I can safely say that majority of the men in the world are born bastards. My views may seem extreme but I speak outta experience! I am pretty fortunate to have around me some of those real good guys. But then again, there are the others…

Case 1: The Boss - Right now the most happening story in my life.

The scoop: Getting hit on by my new boss at my new workplace. Bald and 50, glasses and a mole AND half my height! Oh and yea, he’s got a daughter who’s almost my age!

The Gory details: Unnecessary hand holding, extra long hand shakes (inspite of me trying to yank my hand away), irking references to ‘walks on the beach’ with us ‘holding hands’ and me in ‘western clothes’.

His explanation (for the ‘walking on the beach bit’): To test how conservative Chennai is, and to observe what stories people would spin seeing us together! [To which I actually told him something as lame as my ‘arranged’ marriage would get affected by it]

My retaliation: Though delayed, I managed to muster the guts to go and tell someone about what’s been happening. I know, I know. I should’ve done this earlier (waited almost 2 weeks, but then, it’s just been 2 weeks since I joined!). I should have probably told him off myself. I’m not denying I’m a coward. I hate the very fact that I am. But I just wanted to make sure of his intentions. I didn’t wanna seem assumptive or that I read in between lines. Come on, I was just 2 weeks in! Anywayz, case is pretty much solved. Sad part is I still report to him, but after a lot of convincing from the HR, the MD and a few others, I do see sense in remaining where I am.

After-math: Mr. I’m-so-sexy has his hands to himself and his tongue behind his teeth. (cuz hez got this ugly gap in between his teeth and he talks with a slight lisp when his tongue gets there. Blech!) Nothing untoward. As yet…

Case 2: The Random Lurker – Crass, gross and all those extra-eeewww stuff

The scoop: Me and Dolz. One walk through Rakiyappa theru at 9.30 pm. One stalker. Denim clad, cap and book in hand.

The Gory details: Dolz gets all paranoid that it’s too late to walk. [For all the right reasons. I, on the other hand, vehemently denied and condemned her fears as irrational. Afterall, juz WHAT could happen to 2 SALWAR clad girls walking down a dark alley hardly 100 yards away from their house. Special emphasis on the ‘salwar’ for those of you who are murmuring – jeans la pota pasanga paaka dan seivanga (i.e: if you wear jeans and all, obviously guys would look. Like it matters!)]

Anywayz, back to the scene of action. I keep telling her to shut up and walk. She walks faster. I beg her to slow down. Mr. Hunk walks faster. He overtakes us. I look at her and triumphantly think, “See, he wasn’t out to get us. Happy?” Just then she overtakes him. And I have no choice but to run and keep up. And then it happens. He says “Excuse me”. I don’t know what made me turn (my excuse still is that I thought he was calling to say we had dropped a bag or something). Dolz walks forward. I turn. He says, “If you don’t mind (!!!!), can I taste your ******”. In ENGLISH. Like saying ‘if you don’t mind’ would actually make me not mind. Like it’s mandatory to be polite at the most irrevelant-est of moments. Like I would be all forthcoming in the middle of the road (or anywhere). Like all I wanted was to turn around and….

My retaliation: Thu, oru mannu um illa. I ACTUALLY screamed, pulled Dolz’s hand and RAN. And HE turned around and walked away.

After-math:

1. Immediate: Shivering, sweating, heart thumping so hard it ached, tears and complaints to alllllllllllllll. (except appa amma cuz if they knew, I would be under house arrest irrespective of night or day)

2. 30 mins later: Embarassment. For having run away. Anguish. For his audacity and my foolishness at not listening to Dolz. Anger. At all men, and hence this blog. Resolve. To learn self defense and carry pepper spray. To never walk again- at night. To listen to Dolz more often, she is elder by 4 years after all!

3. Next morning: Sheer self-disgust. Thanks to my darling friends rubbing it in.

“You should have just turned and given him one-tight slap. I would’ve done that”.

“You ran? You should have held his hand and cut it! Carry a knife di”

“Medical advice: Crush his throat with index finger and thumb. Would stop blood to his brain and he would suffocate” (Like my dumb, numb mind could process that then)

Guys advice: “ONE kick where it hurts most. Would have put the fear of God in him”.

Questions my mind is throwing-up (literally) now:

1. Why me?

2. What if his family knows? (the boss)

3. Does he even understand what he is saying? (the stalker)

4. Why me?

5. Why can’t I be bolder?

6. IF (God forbid!) this happens again, what would I do?

7. Thank God Dolz was there with me. If not…? *shudder* [Not like I would have done anything but run otherwise]

8. Any one know where I can get hold of that pepper spray? A shot gun perhaps?

9. Any other suggestions for how to tackle mean men…?

10. And yea...are all men this way????

Answers please!

I Quit...Uhhh...I think...!

Yea, yea I have dunnit! :) ....Or so I'd like to believe... :)

After a million hair-yanking sessions (thanks to which my straightened/ coloured/ streaked hair seems to be facing an onslaught of increased hair fall, more than the normal 100 hair per day, and not because of the straightening/ colouring/ streaking!) with dad, mum, sis, bro-in-law, friendz etc etc, I finally, finally took the step- To go and 'inform' my 'boss' that he no longer has the pleasure of having me work for him! No more "Preeti, staple this" or "Scan this and print it". No more "Are you done with the work...yet?" (when actually it was him who told me he'd do the work and pass it to me for, well, filing!)

As a self respecting, educated (!) person , I was pretty miffed with :
1. Being paid peanuts (though for someone like me even a million peanuts wouldn't suffice- to eat or otherwise)......

2. Having to travel half the way across the world (ok exaggeration IS my middle name, but c'mon, Mylapore to Sriperumbudur isn't really any better is it?) at 5 am to get to the 'factory' right in the middle of nowhere, where water and electricity is a luxury AND...

3. Talking in Japanese at every turn, which has made me a pretty confused individual with a serious crisis because every time I try to talk, my mind scans through the languages I know- Tamil, English, Hindi and Japanese (Thank God I don't know how to speak my father-tongue Malayalam well enough!) before I can get to the right word! And I am not exaggerating this time!!!! I got a call from my mom this one time I was on a trip with one tiny Jap and kept saying 'Hai' for 'Yes' and 'Aa so!' for 'Apadiya'! Considering I alwayz blabber, she didn't seem to notice but it left me feeling like a fool.

And so, I decided to take the plunge. Maybe my 1st job, maybe just 5 months but I don't wanna wait it out just to get the experience thing up on my resume. Maybe I'm wrong but it doesn't take much to realise what's not profitable. (I had people at work and friendz tell me that in words I definitely wouldn't wanna repeat here. But trust me, it worked!).

Now, the reason I say 'I think' is because, ever since I told him I quit, I've been loaded with work and absolutely no mention on our talks! If you're wondering what I'm doing at work still, well, there were these minor settlement issues and the 2-week notice thingie which I needed him to get back to me on so that I could put in the right dates in my letter, and I'm still, being the fool I am, waiting for him to 'get back to me'!

Anywayz, doesn't matter now. To me, I've quit and as of now, I'm happy to be screaming it aloud from the roof tops! IIIIII QUITTTTT! :)

P.S: 1. If you're gonna ask 'What's next?', then hold on, I really haven't decided yet. I guess I'll take a break from all the working for a while...hehe...1st job, 5 months and here I am basking in the glory of leaving it :)

2. I'm giving in my letter the sec I publish this ;)

Cranky Corner...

Working the day after Diwali absolutely kills. Just a day off for the most revered festival in Indian history! The Japs really derive sadistic pleasure in being and making others workaholics. Makes me wanna quit all over again. But then, I get to blog allll I want from here. Which is pretty obvious considering the sudden increase in frequency of my blogs. Two in a day today!

Anywayz, I really,really wish there could be some place where I could vent out my frustrations. A place where people could go and scream out LOUDDDDD, some sound-proof room with shatter-proof glass! Either people just have very high tolerance or something of the sort hasn't been introduced yet. (Hmmm, not a bad idea for a business venture really. And well, I am awfully bored with working.I could call it - 'I Scream' or something. Ok,ok it does sound pathetic and lame to me too!Hmmm, something to think about)

Another Diwali just went by. The new clothes and the fact that it's a holiday sparked my interest in it. Other than for that, it was just like any other normal day. Or like any other festival- vada, payasam, bindi & bangles and family lunches that alwayz turn bad. I guess this is why a family shouldn't consist of 10 kids, uh, right now adults, but with retarded mental make up!I cannot imagine that thse guys are actually blood related! Me and Dolz are God sent angels then...!

Ofcourse, the up-sides of the day were wearing my new designer jeans (Ahem!Flaunting time :D) and my not-so-designer top (actually not at all a designer top, just said it for the rhythm...hehe) in which I ended up looking like a stuffed chicken but yet it's alright cuz it's new, playing with my baby cuzin, all of one and a half years, who makes me happy,happy when he cutely calls me peeeeeti, watching the beautiful sky crack up into beautiful hues of electric blues, reds and greens AND getting to spend time with the ones I love tons! (a few of them I couldn't meet though). Almost perfect...man, almost!

Oops! Work beckons. I've gotta rush now. Until next time, Chotto matte kudasai! :)

M.E = Mount Everest!

I've alwayz wanted to go somewhere high up, especially high up on the Everest. But I never thought it would ever happen! Until last week.....

3 days last week. Nov 1,2,3 2007 - 3 amazing days when I experienced the heights of heights. And loved it totally! :) The Mount Everest part was Ryan's. When I told him I was high, he joked I was Mount Everest. And I thought it was hilarious and soooo true! But yea, I was up there. Free floating and wow-ed. Looking down at all those tiny miracles around me happen- Prathi losing her 'single' status, Ruby partying along with us, Janie and Satti joining us late-nite, AJ down from Pune! Whatever happened after that doesn't matter. The fights, the abrupt ending, the DJ's crappy excuse, I'm just glad I got to look at the world from up there, through rose-tinted glasses- atleast while it lasted :)

The worst part of a high, is the accompanying low. And moreso, the emotional one!I actually said a lotta senti stuff I never imagined I would. Oh crap!

P.S: Pardon the evasiveness but I guess it isn't really rocket science to guess what I'm talking about. And Satti- nope I'm not a compulsive craver of the high-ness. Sometimes it doesn't hurt to break free and let your hair down. And trust me, I get the wild streak from my dad. More details later ;)

Just Another Day in Paradise...

.......or in other words, just another day in the life of P.R.E.E.T.I....and trust me, if this is paradise? I can't imagine hell :)

This was something Satti had asked me pen in ages ago -when I wasn't working my ass off like now [I know I don't need to pretend to you guyz, but, if not you then who else???Tamil la sola pona, unga kita scene podama vera yaar kita mudiyum???hahaha...Itz a senti 'awwww' moment ppl!!]. I told him I wouldn't do it. I mean, cmon, who would wanna take time out to read about me:

1. Waking up at 12.30 a.m (technically pm, though I'm still gonna maintain the 'a.m' cuz anytime I get up is morning and morning is a.m and I'd still say good morning when you call me then though it technically is afternoon!!!confused???)

2. Watching anything and everything on T.V. As I have professed a million times over, I am a couch potato and love being one. I used to watch Oprah on Star World at 2, but thanks to Hallmark buying the broadcasting rights, I was forced to watch Ellen- which I didn't like, not only cuz it just isn't O, but also cuz it just isn't O! Yet, I sat and watched it anyway cuz, what the hell! it's on TV at 2 and 2's a good TV time, just as 3,4,5,6,7,8.......!!!

3. Eating uneventful food like...red rice and rasam..or papadam and curd rice...or bread and jam....or chapathi and dal....or.....

4. Sitting online and blogging. Sitting online and chatting. Sitting online and checking mail....

5. Getting down the stairs as my cuckoo clock starts 'cuckoo-ing' 5 times at 5 (d-u-h!) and 5 is tea time , sitting at the dining table and waiting for Padma to give me tea [and biscuit if I've been a good girl ;) Makes me sound like a dog..hehe]

6. Talking on the phone to Ruby/ Dolz/ Rekz/ Dad/ Prathi/ Jane/ Satti about how bored I am, how I need a job, how I need my own money, how I've aged and put on 5 kilos, how I........

7. Getting back to my comfy green sofa and settling down just to watch the next round of anything- tattoo artistes, cooking shows, Kareena dancing to some silly music or the zillionth repeat of Friends...

8. Talking fervently to dad at 8,when he gets back from work, about my future and what I want to do with it....

9. Finally deciding at 1 p.m [I'm sparing y'all the post meridien explanation :D] to hit the sack and dream about...nothing or something or anything!

Now, temme, you wouldn't really wanna read about all that, would you??? :D

P.S. a) The routine has changed now. I work. And the details are too boring for me to get into :D

b) Coming to think of it, compared to Just Another Day at work- sitting in a freezing cold office on a beautiful rainy day and doing NOTHING- sitting at home and doing ALL the above does seem like Just Another Day in Paradise ;)