Happy Birthday!

Before I put out my trip-log, I just have to post this wish for one of my BESTEST friends- Janie Wanie! There are like a million names that I've called her through our 7-year friendship (Can you believe it has been 7 whole fucking years..!??) Janie, Johnny Bravo, Panni etc etc, basically anything but her real name Jane!

Through 4 years of engineering and another 2 years of MBA, we've been through every-single-shit of ours together. There were some crazy times when we stopped talking to each other for totally pointless reasons but I always knew deep down that together we were meant to be! Ok, being senti is sooo not us, so I'm cutting this down totally :D

Whether or not I express it (it just wouldn't come out right, however I try), I know for sure that you know what you mean to me. The both of us somehow have that weird connection - we just know it, accept it and don't care to express it. And to me, that's what keeps us going. Love you always and forever - so, so very much di. You truly mean the world to me. And we're gonna make it through tough times ahead together :) Here's wishing you a super Happy Birthday and an awesomely, absofuckinglutely (quoting you!) kick-ass life ahead. Muahhhh!!!

P.S: This post hasn't done even 1% justice to what you mean to me, Jane. There are way too many things to mention if details are to be given. I could go on (pretty much) forever on this!

Cuteness in the Darkness :)

One night last week, something really cute happened. It actually involves a biggg bag of mixed emotions but I still think 'cute' topped the list :)

It was around 3 am. We were all asleep (like naturally. And yea, I sleep with my parents. No further questions). Through my hazy, sleepy-as-hell state, I heard someone sobbing like a baby. Initially I thought it was someone laughing in my dream but then I realized it wasn't and that it was my mum crying.

Now, lemme tell you, ever since her heart attack 2 years ago, she's paranoid about dying in her sleep. We've realllyyyy tried talking to her about this a zillion times over and tried getting her outta this silly mental framework, but it just doesn't seem to work. And to top it all these stupid tamil magazines that she reads and TV shows keep harping on sob-stories and tragic incidents in people's lives. Once in a while it is ok to probably get a dose of reality, but otherwise I think such shows must truly be banned. Oh, and credit must also be given to those veritable pakkathu-aathu maamis (next-door aunties), who keep going, "Rukku, epdi iruke? Heart attack ku apram elam ok dane? Unaku teriyuma, aniki kooda enoda akka-ponnu oda maamiyar heart-attack la apdiye thookathla sethuta. Careful aa iru" (Long dialogue, sorry, but here goes: Rukku, how are you? Everything is ok after your heart attack aa? You know, even that day my sister's daughter's mother-in-law died in her sleep of a heart attack. Be careful). It isn't a wonder that my mum doesn't sleep at night. So much so that she refuses even to get her tooth extracted because one such 'aunty' told her that her Dad passed away of a heart attack while having his tooth removed! I wonder if there is a personal-life analogy for every death that goes around.

So, thanks to all that and the fact that my mum is really weak herself, she never sleeps. Apparently she gets proper sleep only after dawn breaks because she knows the new day has come and she isn't gonna die in her sleep. (Forgot to mention, the 'stat' she gave an extremely irritated Dad and me that night, was that most deaths due to heart-attack happen during early morning or some crap! Source: Unknown).

And ever since we didn't take her symptoms of an attack to be anything worrisome back then, we now tend to take even small signs slightlyyyy seriously. We try not to show it out because we don't want to increase her already sky-rocketing anxiety levels.

Ok, so where's the cuteness in all of this? Let's get back to the 'situation'. Dad wakes up, jolted from his deep sleep by my sudden,"Appa, amma azhara" (Dad, Mom's crying). And he immediately takes mum into his arms like a baby and rocks her slowly, soothing her down and intermittently asking her,"Enna da aachu? Are you ok? Naa iruken illa? Enna achu? Bayapadade da kutta" (What happened? Are you ok? I'm there, no? Don't get scared baby). And I just couldn't help but feeling like one total idiot for being there in that room right then. But I was rooted. Because it was soooo cute and special to see their love going rock-solid strong even after 30 years. I've always admired that in my Dad. His love and the way he expresses it, it just makes me cry all the time. And my Mom is such a baby. She uses it, you know, her innocence trick. Doesn't work with us but works allll the time with Dad.

Infact, yesterday Dad was realllyyyyy upset he lost his wallet. One reason, apart from the existence of all his cards and contacts in it, was that getting a white wallet is really difficult (Dad wears only white, even his belt, shoes, socks etc etc). But it was only slowly that he blurted out the real reason - He was extremely sad because the wallet had a 30-year old snap of Mom - the way he fell in love with her. And he was pissed as hell with himself for being careless. Not for the wallet, not for the money or the cards, but for that 1 snap. I seriously, seriously found that super-cute.

He isn't the eloquent, quixotic, romantic kinds. Really isn't. But these small gestures of his are sooo...soo....special in their own way, it really rekindles my dying respect for love and its hype. Makes me feel like that little girl waiting for her Prince Charming to come get her :)

P.S: I've been away from the Blog World for 9 days. 9 days of not posting is huge by my own standards. I actually didn't feel like getting on. I guess battling the call to turn Anonymous had a lot to do with it, with mild coaxing from people around me. I still need more thinking on that.

Baby Talk...

There are 2 basic reasons for this post:

1. Baby talk is in the air, or rather talk on babies is in the air. And poor Dolz is bearing the brunt of every Gita, Sita & Rita (Incase your going huh...? It's the Indianized, womanized version of Tom, Dick & Harry) enquiring in hushed tones and dumb charades-ish actions- "Any good news??" So much so that our family prefers not to talk or get too socially involved with anyone other than the 5 of us and ofcourse close friends. That is just sooo much better than having to give 'excuses' like,"Oh, they both are in IT. No time you know" or "Ippo vendanu solranga" or "They are trying, but..." I mean, whatever their reasons are NOT to have a kid right now, it needn't be published in the Mylapore Times, right?

2. All that baby talk made me think of my childhood. I mean,I can't believe Dolz is gonna have a kid!I really feel me and her are still stuck somewhere in between adolescence and adulthood and are still nutty as ever. And here she's gonna have to raise a family..?!?!? And what would that kid call me...chitti, aunty, masi...? Uhm, I think I'd rather have her/him stick to calling me Preeti. It is way cooler, isn't it? Besides, it would be an Ego booster :)

Till I was in the 10th standard, me and her never discussed the B word (B=>Boys). I wouldn't dare breathe a word about the cute guy I had my eyes on. And she used to consider whatever I did or said as "Baccha stuff" ['Baccha stuff' was this ultra-famous phrase used back in our school by all the 'Seniors'] I never called her akka or anything, but I always felt the 4-year difference between us. Once we moved to Chennai, living alone really brought us closer. I've been really mean to her cuz of some a**-hole. I didn't talk to her for a while just cuz 'this guy' told me to (Don't ask me what I was thinking then, I really don't know). She used to cry and ask my friends to get me to talk to her, while I would turn away and cry silently :(

Leaving that silly phase aside, I must say that now me and Dolz are inseparable. She's probably the only one who knows me inside out. We still love watching cartoons together, have these CRAZY names (we both call each other 'buji'. The others are unmentionable) and brawl like maniacs in detention. I can show you nail marks on my right forehand that she gave me last month. I responded with a solid punch on her back :D buhahahaha! My friends have been witness to some extra-violent, true-blue WWF at our place. Hair-pulling, dress-tearing, expletives^infinity et all! But the next second, we'd act like nothing happened! (My mum gets super pissed for this cuz if she tries stopping our fight, we gang up against her instead)

For all that she's been through in life, I'm so, SO glad she's happy and married now to this superlicious guy. And the fact that she's still in Chennai and we still get to do all our silly stuff together is another thing I'm thankful for!

Oh, buj, I know this is all senti, and you and me are never that way, but I must tell you that I couldn't have asked for a better sister. And I don't know what I'd ever do without you. "Buji buji boo, I love you" [to be sung to the tune of the title track (!?) of Scooby doo ;)]

Minna-san, Okurimono ga suki desuka?*

Japanese to English Translation: All of you, do you like gifts?* (That, btw, is a dual purpose title. One, to show off my Japanese proficiency and Two, to increase curiosity in the post. Smart, I know)

*I know I do. I LOVE gifts - both giving and getting. I know it's the thought that matters and all. I totallllllllyy agree. I don't get sad if I don't get a gift. But I'm super happy/ elated/ jubilant/ springy/upbeat....(you get the drift) when I do get a gift. And I truly consider myself blessed in that respect. Cuz I have some of the BESTEST people in the Whole Wide World around me!
See, it goes like this. During my engineering, my parents were abroad => cash inflow was pretty good. That was probably the time when I gave the most. After that, I went on to do my MBA. At that time, most of my engg friends had gotten into TCS/CTS/Infosys/some IT Company. And Dolz was also earning top-notch. So, I was the pampered friend/baby-sister. Birthdays meant a million gifts. I'd get every single thing I wanted. Mum was absolutely disgusted at the way I used to squeal with delight at the gifts and she used to remind me that I have to also give in return. But my friends never let me. "You're not earning yet", they'd say.

And then after MBA, I waited 4 months to get a job. By then the engg set was well settled and the MBA ones started working. So I was pampered again. Then when I did get a job, I got one which paid me peanuts. I couldn't even meet my own auto needs from Mylapore to Adyar and again they'd say, "C'mon, you don't have to spend. When you get a better job, you can get us something". I've received gifts ranging from: Clothes to Cellphones to Ipods to Customized-Calendars-with-my-Pics-all-over to Bags to Shoes to Watches to Books to Flowers to Cakes to Chocolates to Make-overs to Jewellery to.....!!! And now, finally, I have a good, decent paying job. And it's time I start giving! Trust me , it isn't easy. It requires sooooo much of thought!

I cherish each and every one of those gifts. I even save the wrappers and the tiny 'Best Wishes' cards that come along with them. I've got every single card I've received since I was a kid. But one of my most recentest gifts is definitely one of my most bestest gifts. Totallyyyyy unexpected. It was given by my Pp. My lil bro baby, the sweetest, cutest, nuttiest person I've met. Whom I love oh-so-much and whose smile is just to-die for! All of 18 years and full of fun and spunk!I simply cannot imagine an hour without this lil hunk, forget a day. When I opened the gift he handed me, I just sat there, not saying a word cuz, for once, I didn't have anything to say!I was speechless. Stunned into silence! (For those of you who know me personally, that is a pretty impossible task) Din't know whether to laugh or cry, to jump in joy or run outta there and show it to everyone I know!He designed a CD for me. Like, put in a few of my ultimate fav songs, designed the front and back AND got it printed on the CD. My FIRST Customized CD. And he addressed it to -"The Best Sis in the Whole World!"And he did it for ME. *sniff* While I get down to some crying and nose-blowing, you guyz can check it out:



Beautiful huh? Pp, Muah! Love you alwayz kiddoooooo!!!!

Next is by Ruby. Ok, to get into the history behind this, I must tell you I'm totally not a gadget person. Cellphones are solely for 'communication' purposes and I find absolutely no joy in wasting money on a new phone. My friends have tried over and over again to get me to change my phone. I had a 3310 till a year back when a friend gifted me another. That stopped working and I've been using my sisz throw away 6600 ever since, which was in a deplorable condition when I received it and I've managed to damage it even further. It was silver earlier. Now black. It didn't have the keys 'enter' and 'a,b,c' and so i had to use my nails to get inside and type it out. I didn't even find it necessary to change the panel! And so, Ruby dearest decided to do the honours. Gifted me a whole new panel, with a new keypad, a new battery AND a memory card (which is from Satti too). My folks actually thought I got myself a new phone! And me, being the bitch I am, have been cribbing that the 'new-look' for the phone isn't me. And that the phone isn't quite the same now! I know I'm a pain! Rubyyyy, I LOVE it. And I LOVE you! Thanks really, really, reallyyyyy!!! Don't have a snap of it. But it looks super sexy. Totally new.

Don't you think I really am blessed to have these people?

*sniff* There I go again! *sniff*

P.S-Update: It is NOT my birthday. I'm a Cancerian and hence, my birthday is in July! And if my Birthday was coming, the countdown would've started 2 months in advance! :D These are just chumma gifts, which is what makes them a lot more special-er :)

BLuSh, CrUSh and ALL that MuSh!

Update: Note to Public- I am NOT getting married YET. What I meant by arranged marriage time is that, my parents have been bitten by the 'kalyanam virus' and decided enough is enough and wanna push me out. Considering poor lil me has noone to show-off to my parents as 'the man', I'm left with lil choice but to say ok to the entire (pathetic) process! And the process has just started. Will definitely keep you all updated. So please, I'm not aunty, YET! :(

As much as I have tried denying it, as much as I hate accepting it, I blush. At the drop of a hat. Uhh, actually a name. Ask Jane. She'd tell you. Cuz she's the first one to figure it out yearz back. I blush when you mention certain names. I don't know if my complexion allows me to turn red, but if it did, I would. Beet red. That sudden rush of blood to my face, causing a flush that's called a blush when you mention the name of a crush that makes my insides go mush!

Honestly...? I must admit I don't know if I know what love is. As in, the real love or true love or whatever. I mean, there may have been 5 guyz in my life, but they were all the wrong ones. Only 2 of them meant something. The 1st one cuz that was the longest and the 3rd cuz he treated me the best. In the 1st case, I was wayyyyyyy too young when I was in it. I was more in love with the 'idea of being in love', than in love itself. Carried away, quixotic, all that. And then reality struck. The other 3 were friends, on the verge of becoming more. Professed their love for me and I was in the confused,"Hmmm, he's a nice guy. And a great friend. Maybe he's the one...???" state. But nope, they weren't. Cuz they just weren't genuine. And I found that out later, luckily before things went further. Now, with the 3rd guy, everything was perfect. Like in every-fucking- possible way. The real deal and then wham!it was over (Short and sweet...?) As I did mention in My 10 most, he passed away a year later and the only explanation I see for us breaking up was that God willed that way. To save me the trouble of having to deal with the grief of him going away that way.

Ok, this is sooo not meant to be sad! So lets regress to the basic point - Blushing and crushing and mushing! (henceforth BCM). I may not know what love is but what I do know is that, to blush, it doesn't have to be love. Could be that cute guy passing by. Or, a call from a guy I really like. I even blush when people make fun of me with some random guy! I have this smile stuck on my face -Colgate style - 32 teeth, cheek-to-cheek (or rather whatever my tiny lips would allow) and thanks to Jane's publicity, everyone I know, knows it now. And I hate it! I hate that I blush and I hate it that I'm so readable!

I really am not all that romantic a person. I'm not in denial here. I really am not that extra mushy,'oh my baby baby' kinda person. I don't mind being called that way. But reciprocating it is a different ball game. I love flowers and gifts and all that. But am not much of the candle-light dinner type. I would prefer to go to a movie (I actually went for Marudhamalai!), normal dinners (as long as there's food!) or even coffee (the drinking kinds, d-u-h).

I don't feel the need to hype every occassion (but for a birthday) and disappoint/get disappointed when high riding expectations aren't met. The simple things matter to me. You know, simple caring gestures go a longggg way in making me feel secure rather than mile-long speeches professing undying, unrequitted love and its likes. Everytime I've heard it, I was left stupefied at how people could actually say stuff like that. My reply:
1. Aloud: "Aww, that's sooo sweet!"
2. In the confines of my mind, "Naa already 3 timez kaadhu kuthiyachu pa! (Translation: I've already pierced my ears thrice. Uhmm, doesn't make sense in English, so forget it)

And now it's arranged marriage time. I'm not gonna get into my woes on that but my sentiments are: Unknown guy = extra low levels of BCM. Friends say that'd change and things will get all happy, happy and al. But, I can't help but feel doubtful now. Hmmm, all I can do is wait and watch. Let's see, pakalam, dekhte hain, mitteyou!

Sooooooooooo...Temme guyz, what's your take on all this? What makes you BLuSh, CrUSh and ALL that MuSh!?

P.S: 1. I'd especially like to hear from Mayth aunty on this. If you don't mind :)
2. I take this opportunity to profess my unconditional love for my Best Bosom Buddies, my Darlin Dido Dolz & Ultimate Superstar Pp ;) And I accept your respective speeches, and I promise my 'inner voice' is silent through it :D I have a crush on you guyz man ;)